Yes... yes it is.
We all know it is only a matter of time before it happens, and so I am here to inform you that preparing for the Zombie Apocalypse will be a good thing for you.
For starters, it gives you additional preparation for other, more trivial, disasters. Major Earthquakes, Floods, Fire-Of-London and Bad Disaster Movie style events can all be accounted for in your Zombie Apocalypse plan, for nothing takes quite as much preparation as your plans to survive the unending hordes of the dead. Not only do you have to have an escape plan (useful for all disasters) and additional food supplies (useful for longer term disasters), you also know what to do when some one or some people decide to begin trouble down a dark alley.
In order to be prepared for the Zombie Apocalypse, you need to be fit. Let's face it, a quick and easy meal is the food of choice for pretty much all of the mindless people/zombies out there. Therefore, you must make yourself a hard meal for the zombies. The easiest way to do that is to be faster than your soon-to-be dead associates. Taking up a sport will put you in good stead for when the time comes. You don't necessarily have to be a world class athlete either, just being faster than the slowest person is enough to save your skin (and brains). Not are you only just improving your overall fitness levels, and so quality of life, you are giving yourself a tremendous advantage over other people in the Apocalypse.
Sports that focus on hitting, such as Hockey, Tennis and Cricket, will also give you additional training in use of blunt instruments.
Those of you with siblings probably already have a headstart too as there were countless hours of “play” fighting that should come in useful. You never know when a kick to the head that removes teeth will come in handy. I know I have trained for that.
Team Sports can focus on team work with people. It is essential that, when everything goes to hell, you know you can trust your partners.
If all else fails some sneaky tricks, like tripping over your associates, may give you those vital few seconds that can make the difference between you becoming a zombie or not be coming a zombie. Anyone who has played sports where there were dickheads on the opposition, or those who had siblings, will know how to apply such a manoeuvre and it can greatly increase your chance of survival.
Some of you may already be learning how to deal with zombies in their day-to-day life, and this is a brilliant thing. I know that there are a solid portion of people within this town that already show zombie-fever-like symptoms:
Lethargy
Inability to think or move quick
Stupidity
Desire to inflict pain and suffering on those around them
Inability to take care of themselves.
Identifying these symptoms in people will allow you to know who is infected and who is not. Don't let differential diagnosis, like Alcohol Intoxication or mental retardation, fool you – many people are already infected and it is just a matter of time before they go berserk. By recognising these symptoms, and more, you can make yourself aware of how likely the Zombie Apocalypse will happen within the next week and take further precautions as necessary.
Some preparation for the undead hordes may include purchase of otherwise innocuous equipment. Such things as Samurai swords and bamboo fencing are not only useful in the Apocalypse, but can substantially increase the value of a room or home.
Now, to the benefits to be had mid- and post- Apocalypse.
We all know that people are constantly worried about job security. Well, you won't be worried about that during the apocalypse. In fact, you are guaranteed employment during and after the Apocalypse. It will be easy to change jobs too. No longer will you be bored in an office somewhere. One day you could be a major general organising a mass movement of troops through hostile territory, the next you might be the manager of a construction site. The day after you could be head chef of your own restaurant and the day after that you might be a lone philosopher or a medical doctor. With such a wide array potential job choices, it's hard to see why people could think that the Zombie Apocalypse will be a bad thing for the working person.
And job satisfaction is always high whilst working through an Apocalypse because nothing says job satisfaction like the phrase “I am glad I am alive today.”
After the decay of bodies has been complete, a process that may not take all that long in some areas, the air quality should be vastly improved. There will be very little pollution from vehicle emissions, so even big cities will see the smog start to clear after a week or so.
Land will be dirt cheap during and after an apocalypse. In fact, the only places that will still be in high demand, and so therefore high price, during an Apocalypse will be the Supermarket, Fuel Stations (for a little bit anyway), the Hospitals, Boats and the Pubs. Everywhere else will be basically free once you get the squatters off the territory. Just think... you could be living in a mansion by the seaside once this all blows over!
I am sure that there are many other benefits to the Zombie Apocalypse that I have not thought of, so add some of your own tips and thoughts to the comments.
